it is late and i've had some brandy

Why won't men be men? Why is it that so often men fall short of any sort of gentlemanly conduct. The other day I was sick, walking out the door with several bags of trash into 20 degree weather when a male friend of mine stops says something random to me and then promptly watches me and my heavy burden troop out to the dumpster. How frustrating? Yes I was completely capable of doing so but he should have assisted at least held the door. I know I go on this rant often but it is something I am constantly faced with. Men refuse to be men. They seem to have forgotten that they are the stronger protectors of the human race, whilst we women are still the fairer sex even if we have come into our own in the work force.

I was told the other day, for at least the 20th time. that I am an intimidating person. I don't know why. Just because I have the guts to stand on my own two feet? Just because I am not afraid to speak my mind? Because I am not afraid of who I am?

My dearest friend and I were discussing feisty women found in literature tonight, Elizabeth Bennett, Jane Eyre, Amelia Peabody, and we were trying to decide if these women who are beloved by women were beloved by men. These characters that we hold dear and that we see parallels in our own personalities, are they at all liked by men? Or are they held in distaste? Is it wrong that we are feisty strong women? Should we be sweet doe eyed damsels in distress, waiting for our knights to come save us? Or is it alright that we can pick up a sword and defend ourselves against our foes? It doesn't mean that we do not need help. I am the first to admit I need assistance in all sorts of matters. Just because I can and will pick up that sword and defend myself does not mean I want to do it on my own, nor does it mean I do not want a man to do it for me.

This whole discussion came about because there is an issue with boys asking me out indirectly. They skirt around the point, they hem they haw. They do not say Would you like to go out with me to my face in a direct and clear sentence. Why is that? A boy said to me the other day "Why is it the guy has to ask the girl?" I told him it is because it is a way to show your strength and your courage, it is a way for the woman to know she is admired and worth taking a chance on. We no longer ask to have duels fought to defend our honor or win our hands. There are no dragons to slay or warlords to overthrow. All they have to do is take that risk of being rejected, take that risk of failing. Show that you care enough to take that risk.

And please help your friend with the trash, it means nothing more than a kind gesture. I promise not to read into it and think you are madly in love with me. I just really don't always want to do everything on my own.